Keep it in your pants. Please, I’m begging you.

Warning: this post is SUPER NSFW.

Conan Exiles recently added a series of new emotes, which include dancing. They’re pretty cool... when your character is fully clothed. If not, well, things quickly dart past Sketchy Avenue and go barreling down Nightmare Alley. This goes double if you’re dancing while running, as PC Gamer’s Chris Livingston discovered.

I present exhibit A:

And exhibit B, which is kinda cute until OH NO HIS SPINE:

And exhibit C, which just kills me:

Dicks are fine. Some dicks are even very good! This, though? This is not what dicks are supposed to do. These dicks have committed heinous dick crimes and should be put in dick jail. If you see these dicks on the street, do not hesitate to call the police.

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